2004-05-21

(Warning: graphic descriptions of bodily functions follow)

Fuck, today I have been so ill. Four a.m I woke up needing spew. Which I did, thinking I’d be OK soon. “Just a dodgy pub meal” I thought. Six hours later, I was disappointed, still spewing. By that time all I had was bile and water. In addition, I was having a good run of what I have heard referred to as ‘arse whaz’. More genteel folk call it diarrhoea. And when you are spewing, its hard to hold it in at the other end, so I had some interesting times and some laundry to do.

I was so thirsty, since I kept spewing up any water I drank. My whole body ached from the constant spasming of vomit. I couldn’t sleep as I felt so ill. I couldn’t believe I’d felt so sick, I certainly hadn’t been that ill in years. I lamented the fact that I didn’t just spew and then feel better. It went on and on and on and on…so it seemed.

By midday it was pretty much over for the bodily explosions. But the fatigue would last well into the night. I started to realise how much I really value my health, and how much I hate feeling sick and helpless. And the fact that if I can’t work, I am basically stuffed, which freaks me out a bit (I’m a casual employee with no sick leave or sick pay). And THEN I read the paper and there was an article on chronic fatigue syndrome, which scares the fuck out of me, personally. So unexplainable, so debilitating, so isolating, so fucking tiring.

Nods came home at about 2pm and gave me some sports drink to help my body aches. Later, she cooked me soup which was fuckin’ gold.

Now its 10pm, I feel better, just tired and my stomach is sore...